the passion of red screams through spirals of secrets and messiness
how loose and nonchalant things begin
how quickly we twirl into oblivion never knowing when we let go of us
never realizing how cold we turned away from each other and towards others
why are we so comfortable in tragedy? why is us too hard to fix? giving up will creep in the horizon- will you give in?

im with beauty
a tarnished rare light
illuminating life with such grace

im with beauty
so she is common
obtainable
reachable- lacking value because im with beauty

mystical but too often i see
I want one whose eyes pass me
treat me ordinarily
i want a beauty who doesn’t want me
fascination
fantasy
i want someone who i can only reach in my dreams

i know i’m good enough. I’m good enough. I have issues but I’m still good enough. I’m beyond top shelf. I’m beyond royalty. I’m good enough. I am young and free with dreams. I will succeed through every obstacle every problem, I will succeed. Nothing will stop me. Not me, not you, not even family. I am in love with my own entity and if you can’t do the same and come with me on my journey then flee far from me. Be gone out of my vision; get out of my scenery

i’d love you til my forever ended-
caress your molasses, kiss your melanin blessed skin
i’d fall deep
into
love’s abyss
with you

when you are down, my love, it is we who i must lift up

feelings transfer as if we are one

in my eyes, we are

one

good morning dreams of frustration and loneliness

awakened by spring birds chirping

water splashing

shhhhhhhh

tires drift deep in water puddles 

silence

back pains 

bed full of clothes and things

mind over thinking over working over active

i saw you
numerous times
by accident of course
by happenstance i opened my eyes
and there you were
fighting the pure glances of your past
there you were staring with a twinkle in your eye full of regret-
i wish it was easier for you like it was before
to let me caress your heart and soul
with pure strokes of my love
my hands are filled with love even when you outcast me like you do the world
my touch is full of love even though you back away as if im poisonous
my heart is full of love even when my words are coated in evil
im not evil
or mad
just protective
as are you of your heart
we’ve been hurt so we act like we’re potential enemies when we’re just imperfect lovers
we make mistakes
but we embrace the bad instead of the great
we both do
that’s how we end up here
lost in the whirlwind of love
wondering
if this
is right
but at one time we knew
we still do
thats why my heart aches for you even when you’re right there and why you can’t help but wait until i sleep so you can stare

leave i would never but my soul needs another endeavor. another way to express without feeling worthless. give my all i have yet to do. i will always remain faithful to you tho. the way you’ve touched my heart inevitably i’d fall for you. fall so hard that i’d need some reviving. pumps to my chest. keep this girl alive and active. i’ve backed away from love due to miscommunication. seems like the mis comes in on my end so i must fix it or maybe u should listen. use those ears that sit so proudly upon your head. they’d surprise you how well they work outside of music and television. i’m the vision. i see it. and if you’d look past my confidence you’d see it. lick my persuasion, ain’t it sweet? i swear when i back into the darkness you’ll miss me. come lookin for my light that i’ll keep shinin on ma own shit. maybe one day soon you’ll be good enough for a glimpse like i was good enough to spit ricochet ma bullets got you bent, you hit; bullseye

(Source: supare)

absence 

the silence is 

still

i inhale fear

and exhale worry

the silence

is haunting

my concentration unstable

what should be in my mental?

people say i’m mental 

but the silence

is murderous 

i am paranoid 

it leaves no witnesses

no survivors 

no one

the silence

the silence is death

My Dad,

The one who taught me to never give up

Especially when life gets rough

The one who taught me to stand firm in my beliefs

Regardless of what anyone else may think

The one who taught me to stay strong

Even if it hurts

The one who taught me to never let it show

Because it will only make it worse

The one who taught me my worth

The one who helped rise up a queen

With the vision to find her king

The one who taught me the value of art

The one who inspired my love for music

The one who taught me how to follow my heart

The one who taught me to be me because me is beautiful

The one who taught me life is what you make it

The one who taught me to always do what I think is right

My Dad,

The one who helped create a beautiful queen who knows life is what she makes it.

Who is aware that she must learn from her mistakes and accept her consequences

A queen who follows her heart

Who loves music and values art

A queen with the vision of how to find her king

Because she knows her worth

A queen who stays strong

A queen who never gives up and who stands strong in her beliefs because

That’s what my dad taught me

I am the second generation of a good man

And I appreciate every second of it

Happy Father’s Day

you’ve worked so hard that you forgot about me

the little me

you never got to watch me grow

it just happened in a blink

now i’m a masterpiece

and you don’t understand me

but who ever understands a masterpiece?

(Source: supare)

i’m the bad guy

call me the bad guy

everybody gets salty when they’re dealin wit the bad guy

you’ll never get what you want fuckin wit the bad guy

back away from the bad guy

cut off the bad guy kuz

good never comes around fuckin wit the bad guy

in my thoughts, you are constant

defying gravity as you float upstream

from my heart to my brain then back down to my heart again

everyday

every hour

every minute

every second

making the same trip

with no effort

i know it’s bad when 
i can’t even tell my significant what’s wrong
without sounding crazy
all i know is
i feel pressure 
from each side on me
like
my heart is going to leap
right out of my chest and never return
like
i’m at my lowest
like nothing in this world 
is good enough to keep me from crying 
like i just wanna be held until this
passes away
what ever this is
but i don’t know what this is 
and i can’t verbalize it without you thinking i’m crazy
‘cause
normal people don’t act like this
normal people know what their problem is
normal people don’t just switch emotions
for unknown reasons
normal people have control over their mental and emotions and normal people
don’t want to be associated with me
mood swings soar higher than the sky and lower than the dirt
i out spin the merry-go and tornadoes
with this hurt 
born from joy this pain born from
nowhere i swear i can’t tell you what’s wrong with me but i can tell you how i feel
without a known cause but only if you promise not to judge and leave because it will sound crazy
but i promise you
i’m not crazy 
i just wanna be around people and alone at the same time
currently i am unable to make up my mind
i am hungry but have no appetite
i’m always tired 
but i’m an insomniac
these migraines won’t go away
these tears won’t get off my face 
i just want to feel ok
but i promise you
i’m not crazy i just don’t know
what’s wrong with me

i am a delicate flower with an army of bees

i am beat up from the feet that walk on top of me

i am frozen from the breath of the blowers bent over

from the fingers of the curious

i am a delicate flower whose petals are flawed

or missing

whose core is rotting away- yet i gro

i am a rising delicate flower limp 

from the forceful rays of the sun

with leaves that hold my balance and a stem of strength

i am a delicate flower with an army of bees

whose stingers are sharp

ready to protect me